Life has been so full since my last hurried entry–but not full of weeping and wailing, as some of you might have worried, given the news I received last Friday. The first evening after the news was…rough. I prayed. I considered my options. I crumpled up and threw away the mental notes I’d been making: “No chemo. No mastectomy. Germany on September 22. Radiation–then a long life cancer free.” It hurt. Right down to the white-knuckled grip I’ve had on hope…
so my soul pants for you, O God.
And then my resolve strengthened. The night wasn’t very restful, but it was profitable. And by the time I spoke in church on Sunday, I was able to say again, with utter certainty, “I will trust in your goodness in my season of weakness.” God is–has been–will be–on the Throne. He strengthens me when I am weak, cheers me on when I am weary, and carries me when my strength fails.
I’m now in Colorado Springs, enjoying a time “away from it all” as I anticipate Monday’s meeting with doctors…and the x-rays it will entail. Go ahead–imagine what that kind of x-ray would feel like after a biopsy and two lumpectomies, the most recent of which was a week ago today!
And to help distraction, I was treated to the ultimate luxury yesterday: a pedicure with Jane! She and Sam were dorm parents at Storch back in 93-95, and they have remained family to me ever since. I’m of the firm conviction that everyone needs a wild Texan relative or two!
They’ve made an addict. We spent a couple hours this morning playing Sudoku together…and I think this “newbie” gave Sam a run for his money…! But I wouldn’t want to brag.