I think I might be sick.  I mean seriously, mind-and-body sick.  You see, I’ve always been a promoter of boredom.  Boredom is my friend.  Boredom means I have time–time to catch up on emails, time to read silly books, time to go on much needed, shrink-the-tummy-goiter walks, time to wander over to France for a pastry and a healthy dose of French obnoxiousness…  I love boredom.  At least I used to.  But I’ve been feeling restless for the last couple of days, and I’ve scared myself by channeling Ahram’s general state of mind during Week One of her break:  [insert choleric Korean voice]  I’M BOOOOORED!!!

Now, granted, there’s been some activity.  The two days in Paris with Mari Ellen (see previous post), Ahram bouncing up outside my living room windows and pounding on the glass (she took a couple years off my lifespan–don’t ever scare an old woman, boys and girls!  She gets cranky and nasty as h-e-double-hockey-sticks!), having entertaining IM conversations with Lauren and Jeremy (he managed to give me a backhanded compliment today, which almost gave him enough brownie points to climb back up to 0 on my approval scale), talking on the phone with former students (Magster and Chance, to name two), dinner and “The Last Crusade” last night with the Grubbs (Harrison Ford at his mono-expressive best), dinner tonight with other staff members, another dinner tomorrow evening with my 9th grade teacher who I haven’t seen since 1982, a movie and Starbucks this coming Monday with Ahram…  There’s been stuff going on, I tell you, and yet (brace yourselves) I’m BORED.  I seem to be bored even WHILE I’m doing things.  I know.  Time to take my Valium… 

Self-exploration moment coming up (it’s an ugly business but someone’s got to do it):  Am I really bored?  Or am I just restless?  Yup, I think that’s it!  I feel like I’m living in anticipation of ….. but of what?  There’s nothing new on my terminally bland horizon.  Yet, I lie in bed every night virtually twitching with pointless expectation.  I can’t sleep because–because I’ve officially lost my mind and succumbed to mid-life something-or-other!  Maybe I need to take a pill.  I hear garlic heals pretty much everything, right?  So maybe if I take a handful of the pills, I’ll end up with horrendous breath but a less twitchy, more despondent state of mind that would be ever so much more “en vogue” than the current boredom-slash-expectation I’m suffering.  I should write to Oprah Winfrey, guru of self-help, but I hear she’s busy reframing the world’s most popular religious tenets into one TV-ready life philosophy.  Don’t want to interrupt her subtle erosion of North America’s faith.

I should probably sign off before I embarrass myself further.  I promise I haven’t been drinking.  Or snorting.  Or inhaling.  Really.  Open to any and all therapy methods.  Seriously!  (Lauren, something tells me you might have some insight…!)




  1. wow michele bored?! this has got to be the first..and hey your taking ahram out for starbucks what about me?!!! i’m left all alone no one here beside me..sniff sniff! oh and your email should be comming to you any day now..so that should keep you busy! oh and hey you should try playing soccer to keep you out of boredom or playing with fire or something lol..just kidding!

  2. i meant that comment. I know the feeling of boredom as well. although my resources and creative juices be much more limited than thine. catch ya around oder?

  3. I suggest. . .that you. . .don’t go to college in the middle of nowhere. That’s about as deep as my wisdom can go, as I’m feeling quite similar. 🙂

  4. YES! YES! YES! Finally, I’m rubbing off of Michele!! muhahaha!!

  5. call me…we could be bored together!?

  6. I think you need to start doing really crazy/spontaneous things, like: sky diving, and bungee-jumping, and parasailing, and jet skiing, and wake boarding (that looks awesome!), and perhaps get a tatoo 🙂 maybe try Hollywood and audition for an upcoming top box office seller!, go to Australia, cut your hair short, go blonde! , Make another CD, Visit Venice, Fly to the States one evening and surprise Chance :), go to a rock concert and head bang, publish another novel (I still haven’t finished yours, I hate that I’ve started like 5 books this past year and haven’t finished any of them…I’m slack!), Try knitting, Sleep outside in a field one night under the stars…..there’s just some ideas for you to think about…perhaps 🙂 Love you!!!!!

  7. awww thanks for your comment Mish!!! You are like the perfect person. You know EVERYTHING and always know the PERFECT thing to say. Thanks for always sharing your wisdom!!!!! I want to be like YOU when I’m older!!! Love you!!!

  8. Did you know that pound for pound, hambugers are more expensive than cars?
    A pound of potato chips costs 200 times more than a pound of potatoes.
    When your face blushes the lining in your stomach turns red too. B
    Baskin Robbins once made ketchup-flavored ice cream.
    Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over a million descendants.
    The blesbok, a South African antelope, is almost the same color as grapejuice.
    Womens’ hearts beat faster than mens’.
    Boys who have unusual first names are more likely to have mental problems than boys with conventional names. Girls don’t seem to have this problem.
    In Mexico, the Tooth Fairy is known as the ‘Tooth Mouse’.
    In 1987 American Airlines saved $40,000 by eliminating one olive from its First Class salads.
    Muhammad is the most common name in the world.
    Out of all the senses, smell is most closely linked to memory.
    The most popular sport as a topic for filming is boxing.
    Men laugh longer, louder, and more often than women.
    When a giraffe’s baby is born it falls from a height of six feet, normally without being hurt.
    Fingernails grow nearly 4 times faster than toenails.
    During your lifetime, you’ll eat about 60,000 pounds of food, that’s the weight of about 6 elephants.
    The human brain is insensitive to pain.
    When a human dies, hearing is usually the last sense to go.
    90 percent of women who walk into a department store immediately turn to the right

    Okay, are you still bored?

     pound of potato chips costs 200 times more than a pound of potatoes.

  9. *Sigh*

  10. Wait, I didn’t notice that little dig at me in the last bit. . .what does lil’ ol’ me know about snorting/drinking/”other” therapy methods? *innocent eyes*

  11. Michele!!!!!!  I hope since you mentioned the scandalous naked men movie in a comment to me that it cheered you up and helped fight the apparent boredom in your life!!!  What will people think!  Loved those brownies!!!  Love YOU!  Let’s do something scandalous SOON!  Any ideas?

  12. update: that whole super-long comment I made needs a modification. after much talk and revelation, it turns out that Benny (the sort of Asian, shorter guy) and I are kinda sorta maybe together.

  13. Michelly, thanks for abiding with me even via xanga!  It means so much!  I did think of you and the others whose soft spots may have been touched yesterday at church…sigh.  I would have written sooner, but last night was kind of freaky with Tab out alone in the wooded areas of Kentucky for almost five hours while Ryan was at work…even his grandma was concerned and about ready to go look for her!!  We just wanted to wish her Happy Easter and hear how her job interview went!  That girl…she finally called and felt so bad…she kinda got lost…met some MK from Brazil chick who then gave her a ride back to Ryan’s grandma after getting some water, it was in the 80s there!!!  A mother always fights worrying…so what are you up to today?  hugs and love, Me

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