Monday January 23, 2006

Alright, I promised you my new year’s resolutions, so I’d better follow through. But rather than make a list of things I WILL do in the next twelve months, I thought it would be much more “French” of me to make a negative list of things I WON’T do! After all, if French cinematographers have gained world reknown by making movies akin to a country song (all the good guys die, including the pet gerbil, and the story ends with another threat looming that will eradicate all life on earth), maybe my own negative new year’s resolutions will make some sort of famous top-ten list somewhere, some day!

1. I will not let Jeremy (aka. Joel) convince me that I made him cry when he was in 10th grade! (He’s a compulsive liar, everyone. Really! And I’m a saint as a drama director….)
2. I will not allow Alyssa to pout her way out of a situation she doesn’t like.
3. I will not start a new diet every day, but will endeavor to stick to one diet for, say, a week at a time.
4. I will not cuss every time I see snow in any form (very un-missionary-like).
5. I will stop calling my ulcers by former students’ names: Chance, Grayson, James, Ian, Ryan…. Notice how they’re all guys??
6. I will not hesitate to voice my opinions if speaking is in the best interest of those I love.
7. I will not stay up all night watching the Academy Awards when it’s just as easy to tape them!
8. I will not let the dust on my furniture get any deeper than 1.2 centimeters.
9. I will not sample every blasted cake, cookie, and roll I make at the dorm!!!
10. I will not hold it against myself if I fail to keep any of the above pledges.

And while I’m at it, let me suggest some new year’s resolutions for some of my dear friends and students:

1. Ahram (aka Xena) will dial down the volume on her trademark “MICHELE!!!!!” from 10 to, say, 3.4.
2. Grace Park will remove the name (her own) she sewed onto MY personalized apron!
3. Fiona will stop smiling like the cat that ate the canary (or, in this case, fell head over heels for it)
4. Mari Ellen will endeavor to reclaim her position as “person who knows almost everything”
5. Paul will stop punching his wife in his sleep.
6. Beth will stop being so darn nice to everybody! (Makes the rest of us look bad)
7. Lauren will see a doctor about her quack-disorder and very Tourettes’ish quirk
8. Sun Min will buy a pair of shoes she will call “Mi” and “Shell” (it’s only fair, as I have a pair I call “Sun” and “Min”)
9. Squirt will admit that she actually ENJOYED having me do her hair and makeup for the banquet (she looked smashing–ask any of the boys whose beady little eyes popped out of their disbelieving heads)
10. Someone, somewhere will give birth to a baby and decide I’d be the best possible person to raise it. Anyone? Anyone?

I think that’s all I have to say on this lovely, chilly, snowless evening. I’d have more to say if it was snowing, but it wouldn’t be printable on a blog. Oh wait, I’m not doing that anymore…..

Have a lovely whatever-you’re-having!

Michele